By: Staff Reporter
Tears streamed down her face, a mix of hopelessness and uncertainty clouding her thoughts about what lay ahead. For the second time in less than a month, her family had requested money from her. The issue was that she had already given them money when she visited them in the countryside. Now, with just her meager one-month salary of 3000 birr in hand, they were asking for more than half of it. She sobbed, wondering when this cycle would end and when she could finally prioritize her own needs.
Every penny she earned seemed to flow back to her family, leaving her unable to save or even pay back debts to friends. Despite her previous attempts to explain that she couldn't keep sending money, her family persisted. Having arrived in Addis Ababa four years ago with nothing to her name, she felt trapped by their expectations, just like her sister, who had fled the country to escape the constant demands for financial support. Now, with her own family to care for, she struggled to make ends meet. The thought of disappearing, cutting off contact to find some peace, crossed her mind as a desperate solution.
This is what my friend’s house help shared with her: a troubling story about feeling so overwhelmed by her family's constant demands for money that she contemplated disappearing to escape the pressure. This made me reflect on how many others might be silently struggling in similar situations, feeling trapped by familial expectations and financial obligations. It's a common scenario for relatives to turn to those living abroad, particularly in America, assuming they have the means to provide financial assistance. Oftentimes, these requests go unvoiced, leading the family to believe that the overseas relative is well-off.
These dynamic highlights a tendency for individuals to prioritize their own needs, sometimes overlooking the challenges faced by others. Cultural traditions in many countries emphasize the importance of supporting family members financially, especially those living abroad. The act of sending money back home is not only a way to fulfill familial duties but also a means of maintaining social standing within the community. This expectation can place significant pressure on migrant workers, who may feel compelled to meet these financial demands at the expense of their own well-being and financial stability.
Families rely on remittances to fulfill their basic needs, such as food, shelter, healthcare, and education. These financial contributions have the power to completely transform their living standards and enable them to invest in a brighter future. However, for migrant workers, the act of sending remittances can be an immense financial burden. Despite earning wages abroad, which are often higher than what they would earn back home, they find themselves with little to no savings after covering their essential living expenses. This leaves them trapped in a never-ending cycle of debt, resorting to high-interest loans or credit advances just to meet the expectations of sending money back home.
The emotional toll of sending remittances is equally significant. Migrant workers often experience overwhelming feelings of guilt and shame if they are unable to send as much money as expected. This burden is further intensified when they compare themselves to other migrant workers, who may appear to be sending more. The pressure to meet these expectations can lead to serious mental health issues, including anxiety and depression. The obligation to send remittances doesn't just impact the financial aspect of migrant workers' lives; it also has far-reaching consequences for their overall well-being. Social isolation becomes a common reality as people struggle to build secure lives in a foreign land.
Many are forced to live in cramped and shared accommodations, sacrificing their personal space and privacy. This not only hinders their ability to thrive personally but also limits their opportunities for professional growth and development. Additionally, the obligation to send remittances means that they often miss out on important milestones and celebrations with their own families back home. Birthdays, weddings, and other significant events are experienced from a distance, further deepening the emotional strain they already carry.
The ripple effect of sending remittances goes beyond finances, impacting every aspect of a migrant worker's life. And certain families may start feeling entitled to these remittances, causing tension and bitterness among family members. Finally, it is crucial to encourage transparent communication among family members regarding financial matters. Migrant workers must feel empowered to openly talk about their financial requirements and constraints with their loved ones, which can lead to better understanding and reduce the burden of sending money beyond their financial capabilities.